Kissing The Water
by Amaterasu135
Summary: Their names are pretty. Mine isnt. Short. Different. Your face twists as if someone has hurt you but you smile anyway. It makes me want to kiss the water and never stop. The only sounds are water and breathing. But now, her song. first fanfic T for fun
1. Chapter 1

This is my first fanfic I've ever uploaded, so it might be horrible XD we'll see. I own nothing~

Their names were all so pretty. Suika, the way it sounded like small, lapping waves. Yuugi, the way it always made you smile at the end whether you wanted to or not. Reimu, the way it rolled. Marisa, the way it hissed in a strong but lazy way. Satori. Koishi. Yamame. All of them. Then there was my name. Parsee. Short, clipped. It always made your face twist into a pained smile in the end, as if someone had hurt you but you laugh along anyway. It was strange. It was… different. I was weak. Weak and alone. "I know I am mocked." I grumbled to the emptiness of the cave. "I can picture them now. Sitting around a table in a room with a beautiful view, and food laid out during a surprise visit. 'Hey, you know that one yokai? The one by the 'bridge'? I don't remember her name, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that I beat her~' and the other will calmly reply 'Oh, her? I beat her last week. It's nothing big to defeat her.' " my voice rose with anger, sending echoes back to me. Even as I spoke, however, I knew that what I said was not true. I was flattering myself. The thought of me probably never even entered their minds. They probably talked of more important things, like the weather. "An unexpected visit… how nice it must be…" I sighed loudly. I heard happy voices outside of the cave and made a face in annoyance. How inconsiderate, did they not realize I was here? How dare they sound so happy while I lay here in this damp cave! I tuned them out as they passed, and sighed when they were gone. This life… is this what it will always be like? I wanted to kiss the water and never stop.

A long time had passed, but I had long stopped trying to keep time in this dismal cave with the pond. Every second, every minute, every hour every day blended together, the same as the last. The only sound heard was that of dripping water and shallow breathing. Suddenly, I heard confident footsteps and scoffed mentally at my jealousy. They became louder and I recognized one of the girls from earlier, an oni named Yuugi. Now alone, she seemed to notice me for the first time. "What's your name~" she asked cheerfully and my face darkened. As if she cared, she was just trying to be polite. She was so confident, so sure of herself. She frowned and began to say her name when I cut her off.

"I know who you are, Yuugi Hoshiguma. Leave me alone." That's right, take that you happy moron. I know who you are, but you don't know me. I smirked at the guilt I saw on her face.

"Well, I would like to know who you are at least. Only seems fair, right?" I scoffed. What here was fair?

"… My name is Parsee." I saw recognition in her eyes.

"Oh, I've heard of you!" oh no, here we go. "I've heard a bit about you from Satori. Such a shame you can't come and party~" Her pity choked me, and her gleeful attitude made me want to punch her. I knew it was stupid to even think of it, so I decided to accept her unwanted pity and move on with my 'life'. I tried remaining silent and looked away, seeing if she would leave. She just sat down as I ignored her. Was she being stupid? Could she not take a hint? I turned to look at her, and found she was staring at me. I shifted uncomfortably.

"What do you want from me…?" she got up and turned to leave.

"I'll be back tomorrow with some food, we'll talk then~" she cheerfully sauntered off to her home, humming a catchy song, leaving me alone and sickly confused in the dark familiarity of my cave. Except it no longer felt familiar with her song bouncing around the walls all night.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the review, I appreciate it a lot ;D Parsee definitely needs more love. As usual, I own nothing~**

I sat excited and nervous, waiting for Yuugi to show up. I shifted around, a storm of emotions settling directly inside my chest. What would she bring? What would we talk about? Would she be as cheerful as ever? But after a while, the innocent thoughts became much darker. Would she realize she doesn't like me like the others have? Would I do something stupid and offend her? I wasn't exactly an expert in oni culture… Would she even come at all? The last question struck me the hardest. More than likely, she would blow me off. She probably didn't even need to cross the bridge, and just did it out of convenience. She could always send someone to do something for her. She could avoid me entirely and think nothing of it. Or perhaps she would have the guts to still use the bridge and just ignore me entirely. After all, I wouldn't call her out. It would be to awkward.

The more I let myself into despair, the more my doubt rose. As soon as I was going to try and forget about Yuugi, I heard her familiar footsteps approach. "Oi~ sorry I'm late~" surely there would be a good reason to why she was late. "I was out partying~" … oh. I see.

"Did you have fun? Well, come sit." She sat and laid out some food.

"Parties are always fun! Oh man, lemme tell you, it was hilarious! Let's see…" As Yuugi rambled on about her party mishaps, I let my mind wander. Were all parties this fun? Where people talked loudly and laughed at every little thing for no reason? There was little to no sound here. Did people always look at each other with warm smiles and open arms? All I had ever seen was smiles and laughter directed at other people, and occasional glares in my direction after being pummeled for being an inconvenience. Even now, though Yuugi was smiling and I was laughing automatically when she did, she wasn't smiling at me. Well, she was, but her eyes were looking through me. And those smiles were not because of me. It was then I made a silent vow that one day, she would smile at me because of me. That one day she would come to me with her fears. That one day she would be the friend I never had.

"Don't ya think?" Yuugi asked, gazing intently at me.

"Hm? Oh yes, of course~" I agreed. I had no idea what she said, but I wanted to appear pleasant to her.

"Hey, speaking of food," oh, was that what it was about? I mentally rolled my eyes. "Where do you get your food?"

"… I steal it." I said, taking a bite of whatever she had brought, I hadn't been paying much attention, and looked away.

"Ya steal it? … That's not a very good thing to do. Here, tell ya what. I'll come by as often as I can and bring you some food~" I blinked and looked back. Was she serious? Most people would have thought 'yay, free food!' but I was happy just with the promise of seeing Yuugi again. And she had made the excuse!

"I would like that." I said despondently, but inside I was completely elated. Apparently we had finished the food without realizing it, because soon enough Yuugi was packing the containers up.

"I'll be back tomorrow with more food, 'kay?" She said, starting to head off. I smiled at her and nodded as she walked off. I was brimming with a solemn happiness. Sure, I would be happier with her as my friend, but I knew it wouldn't last long. In the end, it would always the same. It was just a matter of time before she deserted me. It didn't matter. I refused to get close to her. She was just like the rest, just another passing face in the distance. But for some reason, whenever I look back on that day, the memory is always clouded with restless emotions.

Days passed mostly the same, with laughter and stories and gossip and fears. Much to my chagrin, I found I had come to depend on her visits. On the days she was gone, I found myself wondering what and how she was doing, as if I had anything better to do. Was she making more stories to tell me? Was she alright? Was she talking about me behind my back? I shook my head. There was no way, right? I smiled nervously to myself. I asked way to many questions, especially to myself. Who else did I have, really. The month had gone smoothly and everything felt new and exciting. The stories she told, the people that walked by, the conversations I had with them… things were amazing. But I had felt these emotions before. And I knew what would become of them if I continued on like this. What did I care? What should I care? Life was just a dream. Perhaps more correctly named a nightmare, but it was surreal all the same. Why did I feel this way all the time? Sure I was stuck here, but was it really reason to be like this? The sad part was that I was morbid with no reason. And I hated myself for it.


End file.
